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Post by Grand Moff Poobah I on Jul 29, 2016 13:21:41 GMT -5
Jada had been leaning distinctly towards 'meet,' but the sheer idea of making Enarin think about his parents procreating was amusing. To top it off, she had to admit the daughter was a point of curiosity. She'd never even heard of a Twi'lek-Nautolan hybrid before. It was a matter of interest, even if he had to feel a little creeped out. Besides, Var wasn't technically his biological relative, did that lead to weird psychological Freudian issues? It was too interesting a topic to shut him down before he talked for a bit.
And, like he said they had plenty of time.
When he mentioned the picture, she was able to conjure a mental image very quickly, and her potential questions about the pale woman in it were answered. The family resemblance was due to family resemblance, shocking. Of course the long discussion about Donnie's sexuality was somewhat strange, though Jada had indeed deduced that Enarin's mother preferred women. After all she'd married one. And there was the shirt-changing incident. But the story of Enarin's birth did make sense, it seemed to be a common Boska story.
He burped, she ignored it.
"Yeah, I was wondering how they met. Var doesn't look very Boska."
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Post by The Conman on Aug 10, 2016 21:49:37 GMT -5
Enarin Snerked, it was true that Var didn't look very "boska". She was too lightly coloured, short, slightly built...His mother had found the least boska like woman to marry, somehow. It didn't surprise Enarin, he'd thought about it before, his friends being into curvaceous Boska girls with big chests...Enarin himself dating Taryn, someone who could be pretty succinctly described as having a body for porn. She'd probably done it as a subtle "fuck you" to her parents or something, he surmised...
"Yeah, she's not "Boska"-" He said, with air quotes.
"I mean, I think she was like, born in the fleet..." He said, trailing off at the end, not entirely sure how Var had found her way into the fleet. The teen vaguely remembered the pair explaining how things had happened.
"Anywho, she grew up in the fleet, but I think her mom?-" He said with a questioning tone, picking up the bottle of booze and taking a swig, the burning sensation going down his throat, the teen feeling the booze all the way down, cringing and coughing.
"-Shit...So yeah, like, she was raised by her mum, I know she was rescued by someone, she raised Var, never married, didn't even have a boyfriend from what I've heard. Kinda explains why she's, y'know, responsible, and logical, and reasonable and uses her head...uh...and doesn't light the kitchen on fire like all the time..." He trailed off, realizing he'd gone off onto a segue more about how annoying Donnie could be. Jada gave him a quizzical look and he realized two things.
He hadn't answered her question, and the booze was kicking in.
"How they met, right, ok, so once I'd become a thing, Var's mom realized that all Donnie's friends were pilots and procurers, and she was stuck at home raising a kid and had nothing to do. She, had a daughter, who was uh, Var...Apparently she was rougher when she was younger...So in Momma Var's infinite wisdom, she introduced a woman who didn't like anyone to one who thought being insulted was a sign of friendship...." He stopped for a moment, and took another swig out of the bottle, coughing a bit, then re corking it and sliding it back towards Jada.
"Then they got married and Niri happened." He finished, sliding the MFD off his lap, realizing he was too far gone to fix it anyway.
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Post by Grand Moff Poobah I on Aug 10, 2016 22:53:03 GMT -5
Jada patiently listened to Enarin, periodically reclaiming the bottle and taking swigs. Enarin was... Not the person you went to for genealogies. On the other hand he wasn't supposed to be Ancestry Genetics on the holonet, so you had to deal with it. Var wasn't Boska, her mom was new to the fleet. The daddy issue, as Jada'd learned, was impossible. Scarcely anybody knew, fewer cared. Consistent monogamy was a rare virtue that got the religious ones incredibly excited. The convoluted questions of Var's mom's relationship status wasn't clear to her.
Still he was right, it explained why Var was the one who didn't start fires, and probably also the one who bothered to check the mail and take out the garbage.
As to the meeting itself...
"Huh. Kinda surprised that worked out. I mean your mum's a little prickly sometimes, but can't see her being that problematic, or she'd have like stabbed your other mum in the eyeball with a spork."
Not phrased glamorously, but Jada didn't fret about it. He knew what she meant. Donnie was on the annoying side, and if Var'd had a brutal goth phase, which the eyeliner vaguely suggested, then she'd have probably stabbed Donnie if it was all that bad. Spork maybe. Or a kitchen knife or whatever. As to Niri happening, she wasn't even going to ask. It was weird enough as is.
"You're lucky to have a solid family kiddo, you're probably in the minority here."
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Post by The Conman on Aug 10, 2016 23:25:03 GMT -5
Enarin guffawed at Jada's spork comment.
Momma D had a few scars that could be construed as fork-shaped, though she was in possession of both her eyes, so either Donnie had cat-like reflexes, or Var hadn't tried to stab her in the eye with a spork. The truth was that Enarin knew a lot less than he though he did about how his mom...had met his mom...than he realized. It was one of those things he only realized upon thinking about it, like the story he'd heard when he was a kid about how if he heard screaming and moaning, and sounds of pain, to never leave his bed, because the monster would get him.
Only to come to the insight that it was Donnie telling him to stay put while she...
During the time he was thinking, Jada had continued talking, moving on to how he was lucky to have a family. It was true, to an extent. His uncle Vax had 4 kids with 4 different women...holidays were a mess, mostly because none of the kids knew about each other and were of different religions.
The teen really was blessed, he realized, despite the fact that Momma D's parenting style was more akin to abuse, Var wanted him to get married, have 2.5 children, a white picket fence, and a 9-5, and Niri was a hilarious and horrific hybrid that pushed the boundaries of what was acceptable in science and created many philosophical questions....The teen took a drink out of the bottle and grunted as it went down, the burn was getting easier to deal with.
It was as if Gira had put her soul into the booze, the woman becoming easier to deal with after repeated exposure.
"Heh, yeah..." He paused for a moment, holding up a finger with his other hand, while he took a swig, burping afterwards.
"I bhlarguhurp have an uncle, Vax...I unno if you've met him yet, big mofo, green, looks like...I bhuurraunnoo looks like some kind of big green thing, anywho, he's got like 4 kids, right?" he paused, sliding his back down on the wall, assuming more of a lie than a sit,
"OKOK, so they all don't know about eachother, and they're all different religions...it's bbhhfffuuhhuuking hilarious, you'll love get togethers!" He finished, gesturing for the booze.
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Post by Grand Moff Poobah I on Aug 11, 2016 21:28:26 GMT -5
Jada was beginning to realize that Enarin didn't hold liquor the way she did. He had a weak civilian liver, also a smaller BMI. All his weight was... Well nowhere. The eyeballs maybe. He was burping up a storm and then mentioned some uncle she didn't know. The uncle apparently liked to live dangerously, practicing what the Boska called 'a prayer timeshare' in the family. Religion was a landmine in the Boska. It always was with polytheists.
You had your diehard sectarians. They only held to one of the gods, figuring if you were in good you were absolutely into the afterlife. Others hedged their bets across gods hoping for no ill feelings. The truly reckless ones flat-out followed different religions, either foreign or the handful of idiot monotheists in the Boska who either held all the gods were just one, or that only one was real.
When you catered to multiple contradictory things, that was a prayer timeshare. It also applied to making vows and promises to multiple gods. Bad call.
"I used to think your family probably had a bunch of fancy carpets and ate at a big table with like, three different forks. Guess you always learn something new. Also easy on the liquor Chubbs," She plucked the bottle away.
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Post by The Conman on Aug 15, 2016 21:32:32 GMT -5
Enarin snerked at the comment about forks and carpet.
They'd had a carpet in the living room with the TV and the couch...until Niri set the whole thing on fire and burnt it to a crisp. Along with the TV, Enarin's favourite recliner, and Donnie's lekku warmers. The latter weren't a loss, they made the woman look retarded. Enarin was convinced if they'd taken her to a theme park, wearing those, they'd be bumped to the the front of the line automatically because they'd be convinced she was a few fries shy of a happy meal.
Then there was the silverware....
They'd had to hide most of it, or at least lock it up. Not because of relatives or friends stealing it, or because it was overly valuable and had to be kept clean and shiny, but because Niri had tried to use a Fork as an escape tool and wound up electrocuting herself so badly she wound up in the hospital. The end result was that they had to lock up the cutlery...
To keep Niri alive.
Enarin was about to jump into that story when Jada stole the bottle back, the teen attempting with none of the grace of someone blessed with sobriety, to intercept her and failing entirely.
"Pff...cause if I drink too much what, I'll embarrass myself in front of the planet? Jada, I come from a hubbaahhhffamily where we all got pink eye because Niri wouldn't stop texting on the shitter. Where mom regularly lights the kitchen on fire and we hide the cutlery so Niri won't electrocute herself trying to escape...again...I don't even give a damn if I shit myself and have to sleep in it, this shit's wabbbuuhhhh-Waayyyy too fucked up for Sober Enarin." He said, sluring his words somewhat, while pushing himself into a more or less sitting position with his back against the wall.
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Post by Grand Moff Poobah I on Aug 15, 2016 21:45:00 GMT -5
Jada chuckled, roughly. It was a deep whiskey-cackle she let out on the occasions she did laugh on. They were few, hell half the time they were by herself. Even other soldiers at the recent postings had been a little... Away. Few were comfy enough to make jokes around, they hadn't all figured out what phrases slammed them facefirst into walls. It was a learning curve. Still, the guy had some funny family stories. Somehow she wasn't surprised Niri caused the most trouble, the girl was trouble on legs.
"Because dumbass," Jada explained to his objection, "Survival of the fittest. Evolution. You drink too much and your liver fails, you die, and the whole Twi'lek species on this planet goes extinct. You want that one on your shoulders Chubbs?" She pointed accusingly with one finger of the hand wrapped around the bottleneck. "Yeah didn't think so. Important shit."
She took another swig and gazed out a hole of the dugout.
"Sun's going down too, fast. It's gonna be cold as shit in a hurry. Too bad there's no wood."
A fire would've worked wonders...
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Post by The Conman on Aug 15, 2016 22:14:40 GMT -5
Enarin was a bit confused with where she was going until she'd explained herself about the survival of the fittest thing. He laughed, at current rate of travel the population of the planet had about 5, maybe 6 days to live. If he managed to destroy his liver and die bloated and yellow in less than 5 days, there had to be some kind of award for that, somewhere. It was nearly a moment where he'd say "challenge accepted" and actually try to do it...it'd be better than dying of thirst on some hell hole of a planet.
Hearing the woman actually laugh was a welcome change, he'd been convinced she was some kind of stoic space fascist who never found anything amusing, never slept, and who's life's purpose was to get Enarin buff. The contrast was refreshing, and weirdly helped Enarin relax, if Jada could laugh, things couldn't be totally fucked...then again, it may have been a sign that things were majestically fucked, and he just hadn't realized it yet....
Jada's remarks about the cold made sense to the Teen. Deserts got cold, he knew that, how cold he wasn't sure, but cold...he wasn't entirely sure how to help, he couldn't create wood out of...
Enarin started giggling like an idiot, shaking his head, realizing how dumb what he was laughing about was, but not really caring in the least.
"Heh...wood..." He managed to get out, between breaths, leaning back on the wall, laughing for a moment.
"-You're right...wait...but I'm not the entire Twi'lek..." He stopped a stupid look on his drunken face, his drunken brain realizing what she was probably on about, laughing after a moment.
"-Ah fuckit, I'll help you repopulate the planet, Jada." He said, Jada giving him a blank expression, his hand going to the dirt beside him to prop the teen up.
"C'mon Jada, that was funny...but legit, how're we gonna-" he paused, tugging the bag full of emergency supplies towards him and ferreting around in it for a moment.
"-Like stay warm, all we've got is a couple of these silver blanket things and a pair of glove warmers, it's not like we're swimming in supplies here....I mean we could add your blanket thing you're wearing to the list and hide under that, though I mean I unno what you'll wear...but we'll be like, alive...I mean you stole my booze and are talking about potential extinction, so shit's apparently getting desperate.." Enarin babbled, pushing the bag back towards Jada.
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Post by Grand Moff Poobah I on Aug 15, 2016 22:30:14 GMT -5
Jada shook her head side to side with a faint grin as he chuckled about wood. But the volunteering to repopulate earned another chuckle. She took another long swig and then decided it was better than nothing, besides...
She set about ripping away the stomach of the tank top under her bedsheet Jada of Arabia costume, but she kept talking conversationally as she worked at it.
"We've got a five pack of the shiny blankets, and there's two holes- Don't crack up man, so we cover those up, the remaining three we use as blankets. The sheet's the outer layer. But this right here isn't so bad, the sand'll hold in some heat and I've got an idea here."
She took the fabric and slid it into the top of one of the unopened bottles of shine. She gave it a little shake and lit the shirt. It lazily caught, and she wedged it into the sand. It was an ad hoc lamp pretty decently. There was a reasonable glow. Also she produced from seemingly nowhere a little metal case, and in it a pack of budget imported tabac cigs.
"Want one? Don't usually do it inside." She lit it in the lamp flame and took a drag before adjusting the blankets over the entries, in the process accidentally revealing a large quantity of lean stomach and a small quantity of underboob.
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Post by The Conman on Aug 15, 2016 23:11:31 GMT -5
Enarin cracked up, at the comment about the two entrances, despite Jada telling him not to, as she fidgeted under her Jada of Arabia cosplay doing something with her shirt, he figured, not entirely sure what the woman was upto. He heard a srrkkkrrrriiittt, then the woman produced a bit of black fabric from under her sheet, Enarin looking on intrigued as she fiddled with a bottle of booze, then shoved the bit of fabric in. The light bulb went off in his head, realization dawning on him while she lit it.
Jada made a torch.
Enarin made a mental note to ask Jada if he was ever having a problem with Space Minecraft, woman was crafty, and her plan made sense. Cover up the holes, use the blankets for warmth and the torch, everyone lives through the night. Then she did something entirely unexpected, and offered Enarin a Tabac cigarette.
The teen nodded, somewhat baffled, he'd never seen Jada smoke, she'd never even smelled like it, and they'd been pretty close on the regular during fight training. Either she covered it up really well, or she kept the pack for emergency use when she needed one. Either way, Enarin had lost his somewhere, with his luck they were probably still in orbit with some of the ship and his bong, and Jada having a pack was a gods send.
"Absofuckinglutely, you're a lifesaver...But-" He paused, taking the cigarette and pulling his lighter out, flicking it open and lighting it.
"-I didn't think you smoked, thought you were a healthnut...." he trailed off, Jada putting on a pretty good display, the woman having torn her shirt a bit higher than she'd probably intended, her impressive body on display. Enarin wasn't sure if she'd done it on purpose or not, but he didn't care, underboob was underboob.
He let out a low whistle, never having seen Jada's stomach or...underboobs...before. He knew she was in great shape, but seeing it was something else.
"Daaaamn girl" He said, a stupid, Donnie-esque sideways smirk on his face.
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Post by Grand Moff Poobah I on Aug 15, 2016 23:21:41 GMT -5
"Don' make me kick you in the ass," Jada spoke around the cigarette as she finished hanging the second blanket in a complex maneuver that really did require two hands. Luckily she had the finger strength of a world-champion thumb-wrestler and finished securing it. Then she dropped back into a crouch across the lamp from Enarin. She glanced down momentarily and felt the open bit in the blanket.
"Shit," she muttered, "Gotta get a sports bra that fits..."
Her amber eyes flitted back across to Enarin and she took the cigaratte in two fingers and answered his major query.
"Yeah, it's bad for you. But quitting's easy, done it hundreds of times. Example for the children and whatever. Don't like to live in the smell, don't get that many chances to smoke outside. You get the idea. But don't think for one second I'm not gonna make you work your ass off to make up for it."
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Post by The Conman on Aug 15, 2016 23:49:48 GMT -5
Enarin more than glanced at the open bit in Jada's Desert Getup. She had a white shirt on underneath and she was...black. It wasn't hiding much, he understood now why she'd donned the Jada of Arabia getup, without it she might as well have been naked. White shirt stretched across...pretty big...bust really didn't cover anything, Momma D could have told her that, Enarin figured, realizing why his mom was always wearing dark shirts.
It was a strange feeling, Enarin was having, he'd never seen Jada as overly attractive, probably because he'd never actually looked at her as a woman, more like a "thing", not in a bad way, just not a female of the same species. A pretty attractive one at that, he surmised, his drunken mind made up she was actually "hotaf". It may have been the getup, covering just enough of the rest of her to make him wonder, or the fact she'd done it inadvertantly, or the fact she had a smoke, he wasn't even sure himself, but the thought of having to share a bed with the woman for what could realistically be the rest of his life wasn't one he had any objection too.
It'll probably fit...she's a big girl, bigger than Taryn, it's probably like an endless cavern... His brain babbled, Enarin shaking his head to remove his gaze from Jada's boobs, and shut up the peanut gallery that was his thoughts.
Enarin snerked at Jada's comment, her timing immaculate, her quip about making him work his ass off for it landing seconds after his brain had babbled. Had he been more sober the teen would have probably looked up at the ceiling and told the gods to stop it. But he wasn't more sober, and pretty much up for whatever, and was entirely ready to work his ass off...horizontally...to earn that smoke. The teen knew it probably wouldn't happen, even with a drunken Jada, but still, the man could dream, as far as he was concerned the end was nigh.
"Heh, don't really have much of one, but I'll work it however you want for those." He said, gesturing to the smokes but looking at her boobs, after a moment he realized what he'd done and raised his gaze to her face.
"I- Uh- Not what-" He said frantically, hands up in a submissive way, the bottle of booze being basically highlighted in the corner of his vision, the teen silently thanking the gods as he quickly leaned over and snatched it up and took a long swig.
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Post by Grand Moff Poobah I on Aug 16, 2016 0:03:20 GMT -5
Jada wasn't bothering to give full focus. Mentally she was categorizing what they had. A tiny bladder of water that refilled agonizingly slow. The best bet to aid that was to piss near it and hope the moisture was recycled. She'd fussed with a solar still earlier in the day but wasn't confident with it. Split the difference and try both? Then there was the limited food, the signal difficulties, and the fact the Boska weren't logistically bright enough to figure out they were missing without an engraved invitation. Food and water could last them maybe... A week maybe. If they were lucky.
She'd have given anything to have a map to an oasis. You could live off bugs and shitty water forever, she was trained to embrace the suck. The suck was a way of life. You had to excel in it and just go with it, ride the wave of shit to greatness or drown in the brown like a little bitch. The fact she'd already made it through unknowable depths of suck only meant she was better at riding the wave. Still, this was bad. Even in a Hutt jail you got rats and gruel. This was... Worse. Nature didn't care if you stayed alive to be miserable.
Her thoughts strayed back right as Enarin was stuttering and being awkward. She didn't pay it much mind because he did that kind of thing a fair amount.
"Yeah you've got a toothpick body, you start giving it your all and eating better and you'll fix your crap in no time Chubbs. You just have shitty endurance."
She appraised him with an expert eye and nodded.
"In fact you should gain some weight. Might help. We get out of this shit and I'll make sure you get good protein. How you feel about omelettes?"
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Post by The Conman on Aug 16, 2016 0:41:55 GMT -5
Toothpick body?
He let the thought roll around in his brain for a moment while he came to the realization that Jada had simply not noticed what he'd just done. He silently thanked whatever gods were listening, though the change of gears was a bit sudden for his alcohol soaked brain to comprehend as quickly as it probably should have, the teen giving her a confused look while he processed what she'd just said. It was pretty obvious that Jada wasn't on the same wavelength as he was, he surmised. The woman seemed somewhat preoccupied by trying to keep the pair alive, despite Enarin's best efforts to just not care and drink himself into oblivion.
It was true, he needed to gain some weight...Enarin looked like a stick compared to the guys he worked with, even though they were only 18, some of them were already more akin to a shaved bear than a Twi'lek. The reality was that the teen didn't really eat all that much, part of the reason he smoked as much as he did was because it actually gave him an appetite. Without it the man ate like a bird, just sort of pecking and grazing as he went through the day, never really sitting down and eating anything substantive. Jada's influence had been positive, forcing goo and tofu down his throat. He'd gained like...5 lbs over the past few weeks, so that was a plus...
The fact remained, Jada needed to calm down, she was messing with Enarin's chill and he's just gotten to his happy place, he thought, the dumb look of confusion still gracing his features when he spoke.
"The fuck is an omelette? Jada, if that's some kind of crazy, ball busting workout from hell as some kind of punishment for being a genetical-l anoma- an-nomaly, you-you're just being cruel!" He said, gesturing at her with his bad hand, the good one retaining a firm grasp on the bottle of booze.
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Post by Grand Moff Poobah I on Aug 16, 2016 0:55:30 GMT -5
Jada blinked. momentarily trying to decide how she was supposed to react to that. Didn't know what it was sure, but thought it was a workout? Like that wasn't the way the names went. Balltwister was a workout. Packfuck was a workout. Omelette was... Fuckin omelette was what it was. Did he think a Quiche was a Yoga position or something? Truly to Enarin fitness was what happened to other people. She didn't try to liberate the bottle from him, instead opening a new one and taking a long swig. Her throat was basically scrap iron, so it was fine.
She cackled a little before explaining.
"All right Enarin your genes are showing. So, like Var'd probably try to explain, an omelette is like... Like an egg sandwich. You stick bacon or tomatoes or whatever on top of the egg and you flip it over to seal it up. Convenient, and packed with protein. Should also get you some calcium, you probably have like grandma bones from all the Zero G stuff. Like look, I'm no expert on what all you cool kids do for fun but breaking your bones ain't gonna impress any girl. If it does, turn around and run son because she's clearly into your pain."
She abruptly fixed him with an intimidating look from her yellow eyes.
"You're not into that kind of thing right?"
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